


Worry Not, Sweet Prince

by kageillusionz, ourgirlfriday



Series: Eucalyptus leaf of my soul! [1]
Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Charles Is a Darling, Charles is a Koala, Crack, Erik Logic Is The Best Logic, Erik is Melodramatic, Erik is a Drop Bear, Erik is not a Happy Bunny, He's not a bunny at all, Humor, M/M, Protective Erik, Taronga Zoo, Zoo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-11
Updated: 2014-03-11
Packaged: 2018-01-15 09:42:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1300357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kageillusionz/pseuds/kageillusionz, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ourgirlfriday/pseuds/ourgirlfriday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Very Drop Bear Prequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/990725">The Hug-A-Drop Bear Program</a>.</p><p>[Koala!Charles, Drop Bear!Erik AU]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Worry Not, Sweet Prince

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Будь спокоен, милый принц](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3772816) by [MilvaBarring](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MilvaBarring/pseuds/MilvaBarring)



> Bitch you thought you saw the last of us.
> 
> We can apologize for everything. Mea culpa. ~~But we won't~~.
> 
> Thank you to **EbonyTavern and moncube** for the amazingly quick beta! Any lingering mistakes are our own.
> 
>   
>  _They may have decimated Mine, but they would never decimate his spirit._

It all started about five years ago when Erik got captured in the most humiliating way in the history of Drop Bear-kind. Ever.

It had been a gorgeous morning, the sun high set in the soft periwinkle sky. Annoying Kookaburras warbled on their branches just as equally as Annoying Kangaroos laid about in the bush underneath the shade of the gum trees.

Erik had been minding his own business, making his usual rounds of his territory. He took his duties very seriously for there was no saying whether the vermin called Humans would come and encroach upon his home.

All had been going well. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. He had spent a good portion of the month down by the billabong, for it had been a hot summer’s week and a literal scorcher. The temperatures were wilder than some bloke called Magneto’s practical clothing tastes (he had spied this bloke on the human box one night when Erik had been doing important reconnaissance) and Erik was eager to return to his home, back to the one tree where he had grown up protecting.

He ignored the calls and rumbling around him right up until he spied part of his habitat had been destroyed by urbanisation. His precious tree — he had dubbed M for ‘Mine’ — was no longer there. Humans were cruel vicious beings with no concept of the sentimentality Drop Bears formed with their homes. For standing in Mine’s stead was now a house made of brick and a blue Colorbond roof.

It was soul crushing and from that day on, Erik swore vengeance. He raised one paw up towards the sun, shaking as it was from anger and loss. Tears clouded his vision, distorting the world around him, as they fell into his coat.

They may have decimated Mine, but they would never decimate his spirit.

* * *

The importance of a well executed mission, Erik found, came from a meticulous and carefully laid out plan. Erik spent a week camping outside the home where Mine once stood. The tree he had chosen was inferior to the comfort that Mine once offered. The bark was prickly, scratchy to Erik’s delicate fur, and the eucalyptus leaves that grew upon its branches were sub par. It was unacceptable!

All week, Erik observed the going-ons of the wretched humans that resided inside the house with the blue Colorbond roof. He wrinkled his nose at the quality of the leaves he was chewing as he watched the human family for as long as his eyes could remain open. The humans would pay for their insolence. Vengeance would be his! But quite possibly right after a power nap.

After all, tomorrow would be the day when his mission was a go. It would be optimal to be at his best and go in with all of his batteries recharged.

Early in the afternoon, Erik dropped from the tree and circled the house. Casing the perimeter for any third parties that could interfere with his plans. Once satisfied, he wandered through the open side gate into the backyard. The scent of flowers made Erik gag and he peed on them in disgust before scurrying away quickly to sniff out the perimeter of the fenced backyard.

It wasn’t a massive garden — Erik had seen bigger after all — but the inexplicable urge to mark what once was his with his scent was there. That would show these pesky humans precisely who they were dealing with as he rubbed his chest scent gland all over. His progress was impeded by the presence of yet another gate.

Hmph! These humans were all so pathetic, thinking they could cage him in using something so simple as metal bars! Erik wasn’t a Drop Bear that could be contained!

On the other side, Erik could see that there was some sort of floatation device in the gaudiest shade of yellow that had ever assaulted Erik’s eyes. It bobbed innocently upon a pool of water. Clearly, it had ‘death-wish’ written all over it, and it was one that Erik was happy to grant.

He sleuthed his way through the garden, over the freshly cut lawn and clambered majestically — because there was never a doubt that everything Erik does, it could only be done in this manner — easily over the fence and was presented with his first obstacle: water.

Koalas weren’t strong swimmers. Erik, fortunately, was a part of the superior species as compared to his fuzzy wuzzier cousins; it was no problem reaching the yellow floatation device for a mighty Drop Bear such as he. Clambering onto it was a different challenge, but one that Erik relished.

He bellowed his victory song once he dominated the raft. “This is for Mine!”

Erik sank his teeth into the plastic of the floatation device and shook his head from side to side. The floatation device gave a huge sigh of defeat and it slowly collapsed within itself like a flan in a cupboard. Water began seeping in until Erik was treading water, watching with a triumphant gleam in his eye as the pool raft made a spluttering noise before it dropped to the bottom of the pool.

Justice was best served with his teeth and Erik swam out of the pool in search for more destruction. This was war and Erik had all intentions on winning. He climbed back over the gate, and then up a drain pipe to reach the second storey of the house.

There wasn’t much there except roof tiles, and Erik growled as he failed to get inside, kept out by glass windows. He padded around the side of the house until he reached the balcony upon which Erik found his next target: balcony chairs.

He was tearing into the cushions with glee when the balcony door suddenly opened and a very angry and irritated human made its way towards him with a broom.

“Get off! Go! Shoo!”

Erik, startled from where he had been mauling the soft stuff in the middle, hissed and climbed over the balcony. He intentionally missed his footing and rolled down the roof, gaining enough velocity on his descent such that he sailed through the air. As luck would have it, he landed majestically through the open sunroof onto the seats inside the car parked out on the driveway.

He got himself majestically tangled in one of the seatbelts and then bellowed about the injustices of the fickle humans when he couldn’t untangle himself from the evil clutches of the broad shoulder strap.

“Curse you and your malevolent race!” Erik shouted, addressing the car which did not reply. “I will have your head as soon as I am free! How dare you take Mine away from me? My beautiful home!”

One crystalline tear fell from Erik’s eye as he finally stopped struggling, tired from the human’s clever contraptions. He convinced himself that he would take a quick break to regenerate his energy. The day of reckoning would come after a very quick nap.

And that was how the Wildcare Ranger found him several hours later: asleep in the backseat and grumbling about sweet revenge. Of course, humans were sub-intelligent species. They would never know about the sort of devastation Erik was dreaming of.

* * *

Erik woke up in a strange place far from Mine and the Car of Doom. He was in a cage - a cage! Does human treachery know no end? - and several humans were chattering in what he could only assume was indescribable awe.

“We hope this isn’t any trouble, but we didn’t know where else to take him, Dr. McCoy” one human said to a tall, skinny human with glasses and unkempt hair.

“No, no, no trouble at all,” skinny glasses human stammered.

It was horrible. It would have been horrible enough for a Koala, but for a Drop Bear?!  And a Drop Bear such as himself, no less?  Unconscionable!  The humans would pay for this, locking him in a tiny cage and staring at him.

“I will not do tricks for your amusement, human!” he bellowed masterfully. The humans all tittered but shuffled backwards slightly. It was a small step but it would do. For now.

The humans chattered inanely amongst themselves as they pointed at him and waved their hands around wildly. Even wallabies had more dignity, Erik snorted to himself. It was well known that wallabies were the least dignified of marsupials. He took the time to study his surroundings - it was a strange place, white walls decorated with pictures of the lesser Koala. One Koala in particular, which, even Erik had to admit, was rather fetching. For a Koala. The wall Koala had bright blue eyes that shone over a bough of eucalyptus. He (obviously a he,  now that Erik looked closer (not that he was interested of course, but it was wise to know one’s surroundings. Never mind that he was composing odes comparing the Koala’s eyes to the shimmering of the great Drop Bear Pond near Mine during a midsummer day.)) suffered to let one of the humans near, going so far as to allow it to place its strange, furless hand upon his ears. Clearly the poor Koala had succumbed to Stockholm Syndrome, or something similar. Hatred for the humans burned brightly in his chest.

“Worry not, sweet prince,” he promised the picture, “I will make the humans suffer for the indignities they have hoisted upon us!”

“Aww, I think he’s talking to Charles,” one of the humans cooed. He wasn’t sure what it meant, but he was sure it didn’t bode well.

* * *

After some unknown period of time, during which the humans tried again and again to break Erik’s stalwart Drop Bear spirit by shining bright lights at him and stealing his blood, one of the humans had the audacity to take him in her arms and carry him out of the room and down a strange hallway. He would have attacked with all his Drop Bear might, but deemed it worthwhile to lay low and study the situation until he could come up with a plan.

Also, her arms were quite comfortable. Not that comfortable arms would save her when the revolution came.

“So I think you’ll like it here,” the human said. Well, she’d been prattling on for some time, but Erik had other things to do instead of paying attention to some foolish human. Things that totally did not involve thinking about the lovely Koala from the picture from earlier. Not at all.

“You’ll meet Charles soon enough,” she continued brightly. “You’ll like Charles. Everyone likes Charles!”

“Mr. Sinister didn’t like Charles,” the tall, lanky human walking next to them interjected. He was apparently a veterinarian, which Erik assumed was human speak for ‘grand inquisitor.’  

“Mr. Sinister didn’t like anything. Which is why he and his followers were sent to the maximum security Koala sanctuary, leaving poor Charles alone until now. But you won’t start a revolution, will you, o favourite Drop Bear of mine?”

Erik perked up at the mention of Mine, and was only vaguely aware of the veterinarian human muttering about how Mr. Sinister was a strange name for a Koala anyway.

“You know about Mine?  Of course, you’ve been in on it all along!  You will pay for your malfeasance!”  

“Aww,” the human carrying him cooed. “I think he likes me!”

The red-headed intern that trailed behind muttered, “Don’t bet on it.”

* * *

The humans brought him to a leafy place, not entirely dissimilar to his usual territory but for the unforgivable addition of fences caging him in. He could hear people in the distance. He opened his mouth to let out a fearsome scream, but let out only a startled gasp when he caught sight of a Koala lounging in a tree above him, watching him with curiosity from stunning blue eyes.

“Hello there!” the Koala called in a chipper, lovely-accented voice. “I’m Charles!  You must be the Drop Bear everyone’s so excited about.”

“Indeed!  As well they should be.” Erik said, chest puffing out in a display of rugged Drop Bear-liness guaranteed to sweep the lovely Koala off his feet. Charles tilted his head, clearly impressed by Erik’s Drop Bear virility and superb coat. As he very well should be.

“What’s a nice Drop Bear like you doing in a place like this?” Charles murmured, curiosity shining in his ethereal blue eyes. Erik flushed in shame at the memory of the humans’ dirty tactics. They will all burn as soon as Erik can make his great escape, to show the lowly humans that Drop Bears (and by extension, Koalas) are the superior species after all.

“Let us not speak of such unpleasantness,” he barked. Oh how the loss of Mine burned deep in his soul. Charles’s ears drooped in what Erik could only assume was shared sorrow as the Koala slowly climbed down to Erik’s branch.

“Oh, my friend,” he muttered, eyes shining with indescribable emotion. “I am sorry for your loss.”  Charles reached out, handing Erik a heap of eucalyptus leaves. Erik’s superior Drop Bear senses swam at the close proximity to Charles, and it was all too clear that no picture could do justice to the fuzzy wuzzy majesty of the gorgeous Koala.

How could Charles be filled with such remorse for somebear they just met? Erik had never met somebear that was filled with such compassion and selflessness. Not that Erik prided himself on his social skills, for he was not a social creature by nature and he preferred it that way. Attachments were problematic… and yet.

And yet, he had never met anybear that made his stalwart heart beat so quickly. Could this be what his Mama called love? Could this possibly be the sensation that spread warmth from his heart all the way down to the tips of his paws. But he was a bachelor. He’d never been with another Drop Bear before, or a Koala for that matter. And yet...

In that moment, Erik’s mission (aside from gaining freedom, destroying the world of men, and finding a new Mine) was clear: he would not rest until Charles was his. Mission “Woo the Fuzzy Wuzziest of Koalas and Live Happily Ever After, Feasting upon the Choicest Eucalyptus Leaves in the Sublime Branches of Mine, Warmed by the Ashes of the Human World” was a go.

* * *

“How do you think Erik is fitting in?” Hank asks as he put away the mangled supplies from the Drop Bear’s last appointment. Who knew Drop Bears were so hostile to stethoscopes?

“Marvelously,” Raven beamed. “He and Charles seem to be hitting it off, and Erik only tried to attack three visitors today!  That’s positively docile for a Drop Bear!”

Hank made a noncommittal noise as he sorted out the broken from the decimated, a sound which Raven ignored. Sean would get over it. And it was a great honor to be selected as a manservant by the one and only Drop Bear in captivity. Honestly, she couldn’t see what he was complaining about. Or crying about.

And Hank had been so smug now that something actually ended in tears.  She’d only distracted him when a commercial came on for a new Canadian lumberjack reality show. Bless that Logan Howlett, whoever he was.

Sean, who had come in last, let out a howl as he nearly scorched himself making a cuppa. Raven looked dubiously at the intern. Surely the trauma had not run so deep that Sean would be crying about it again. “Come now, Sean. Surely Erik—”

“Drop Bears,” Sean was quick to snap, “do not need manservants. What the hell, Raven?” He shuffled off to run his hand underneath the cold water of the tap as he shot daggers at her.

“Just calling it like I see it!” Raven shrugged. Perhaps she’d been jaded by how long she’s been at this job. “I mean, it’s sort of what we’re paid to do anyway.”

Hank sighed, plucking the glasses off the bridge of his nose to clean the lenses. “It’s hardly servitude of the Dark Ages… We just make sure the Koalas are happy and healthy. Now could you make sure that they’re doing alright? Start rounds early?”

“I knew I should have taken on that internship at Sydney Aquarium,” Sean muttered as he breezed out the door, a tea mug shouting ‘Koala-tea!’ painted on the exterior held in his unburnt hand. Raven shook her head again as she began writing out the day’s reports. Kids these days.

* * *

Erik glared at the door where the humans would enter and exit. The redhead servant was late. He’d gathered the most tender and tasty eucalyptus leaves for Charles, the Fuzzy Wuzzy Sunshine to the Oasis of His Soul, but he was certain the humans were keeping choice delicacies from them. He’d observed how Charles seemed enchanted by the scent of tea, and had made a vow that he would not rest until Charles had all the tea he could ever need. Rivers of tea. Oceans of tea.

His train of thought was interrupted as Charles lazily climbed onto Erik’s branch, and, bestil his Drop Bear heart, settled next to him. This close, warmth and contentment radiated off the exquisite Koala. Erik cried one bearish tear at the perfection of the moment.

“Eucalyptus for your thoughts,” Charles murmured, pressing another perfect leaf into Erik’s unworthy hand. This was it! The moment at last, where Erik could confess his adoration, and hope that his clumsy love would be accepted by the sublime creature. This one perfect leaf Erik will add to his Precious Treasured Leaf Pile for it was surely a love token to be cherished.

“Charles,” he said, turning to face the Koala full on. “I need to tell you something.”

“Yes,” Charles breathed, moving closer. Erik wasn’t sure, but he thought he saw hope in those ethereal blue eyes. And dare Erik say it, love?

But the moment was shattered by a human, as the redhead manservant loudly barged through the doors.

“Tea service!” The redhead manservant loped up to the enclosure entrance and opened it just wide enough to push the mug through. Erik was impressed at the manservant’s discretion. The humans typically took any opportunity to rifle through his new territory. Clearly he had chosen Charles’s new manservant well.

“Oh my,” Charles said, “Sean left his cuppa. Do you think he’d mind if I just had a taste?  It smells delightful.”

Erik puffed out his chest, proud that his wooing strategy was so far super effective. “By all means, Charles. I’m certain he wouldn’t mind. And if he does, we will teach him the error of his presumptuous human ways.”

Charles gave him a look of what Erik thought might be fond exasperation before making his way to the offering of tea. It was a pity the redheaded manservant forgot to bring biscuits, but Erik was confident he could be trained.

The noise of appreciation that escaped Charles could only be described as alarmingly arousing. Had Erik eyebrows, they would have risen to the vicinity of his not-so-fluffy ears. Really. Erik wasn’t sure whether choosing the manservant had been the best or the worst moment of his increasingly purposeful reign at Taronga Zoo.

Erik was aiming for best.

“Erik?” Charles called out from where he was perched with the cup between his paws. “Would you like a taste?” A taste! Hark his stalwart Drop Bear heart! If this was not a love confession, then Erik would cover himself in dirt and pretend he was a common kangaroo.

“I am coming, Charles!” Erik’s tongue had almost slipped there. It was certainly too presumptuous to call Charles ‘his’ anything just yet. Or was it? Certainly, had Erik been a Koala and in Charles’ fur, he would not have shared tea with the handsome Bachelor Drop Bear that was a recent arrival. Charles was entirely too trusting, really. Erik would have to ensure that Charles cultivated a healthy sense of suspicion and skepticism.

The climb down the tree was less than graceful as he would have liked. There was no way that Erik could match the majesty and elegance that was his beloved. After all, Erik was convinced that there wasn’t anybear as dextrous and beautiful as Charles.

It was fate that they would meet in such a manner and Erik would ensure that when the time arrived for them to escape, their journey to wooded freedom would be safe and swift. They would find a new Mine, he vowed. No, they would find a better tree, and together he and Charles will call it ‘Ours’. No humans possessed the powers to stop Erik from showing Charles his rightful kingdom. They would rule together side by side, paw in paw. Future generations of Koalas and Drop Bears would sing ballads of their glory, and of their uprising over the human scourge.

Charles’ eyes were luminous as he turned to face Erik. “Here,” he said softly, pressing the mug into Erik’s unsteady paws. O, to be so close to the dew-scented sunshine of his bearish soul! Erik’s very soul shook, thrumming with newly found love and adoration for his future Koala Husband. He couldn’t stop himself from spilling some of the fragrant beverage on his rugged Drop Bear coat as he raised the cup to his mouth. Charles leaned closer, as if drawn by the smell.

“Good?” Charles asked, blue eyes sparkling. Erik could barely breathe with Charles in such close vicinity. Could it be that his opinion of this human beverage be so important? Could it be that Charles desperately sought to find whether they were of like minds? His future with Charles all rode on the correct answer to this one simple question. There was no denying that he would be shunned and scorned forever more if he failed to provide the correct answer to this conundrum.

Not being Charles’ One and Only Forevermore was not an option.

“Yes!” Erik bellowed, almost sloshing the last of the tea over poor Charles. “Why this ‘tea’ that the humans speak of is truly the nectar of the Gods! It is the beverage that all Koalas and Drop Bears alike should consume for the rest of eternity. Charles, your taste is impeccable.”

Charles blinked his big blue eyes, looking on in amusement. “Then you should finish it, my friend, if you enjoy tea so much. I’m sure Sean wouldn’t mind fetching us another cuppa when he comes back.” One of his fluffy white ears twitched. “I almost wish he brought some of that tea biscuit with him. I’m quite fond of Arnott’s Milk Arrowroot with my tea.”

Erik puffed his bearish chest with pride. Charles was pleased with the redhead manservant!  Clearly this would prove to the fluffiest, most beautiful of Koalas, that Erik could care for him. He opened his mouth and let forth a bellow from the bottom of his Drop Bear soul to bring forth the redhead manservant again, so that his future Koala husband, light of his life, leaf of his soul, could have his Arnott’s Milk Arrowroot.

Somewhere inside the bowels of the human rooms, Sean sighed.

* * *

One morning, the perfect opportunity presented itself to Erik. He roused Charles from where he had been koala-napping and gruffly ordered Charles to follow him. The door to the enclosure was slightly ajar and Erik knew if there was ever going to be an ‘Ours’ somewhere, that would only ever be achieved if they escaped now.

“Where are we going?” Charles asked sleepily, as he followed Erik dutifully once they reached the ground.

“It’s a new game I came up with,” Erik said as he scanned the horizon and calculating the best course to take. Safety was important and Erik had only wished his parents were alive today to meet the illustrious and radiant soul of his heart.

“A game?” Charles asked, shining blue eyes widening in wonder. Or it might have been the freedom that Charles had just glimpsed appear right before him. Erik wasn’t sure.

“It’s called ‘Escape from the Enclosure’. I was hoping you’d play it with me.”

“Oh! Of course, Erik. Anything for you.”

“Good,” Erik gruffly replied, suspiciously sniffing the air. There was the familiar scent of the gangly tall human, the lady human and Charles’ red-headed manservant. “Come along, Charles!”

They loped down the path, dashing through the underbrush and out onto the path where many humans were loitering. Erik growled. If it was one thing he hated, it was loiterers (barring the fact that Drop Bears and Koalas spend nearly 20 hours a day sleeping). Human loiterers were the worst.

“Do you mind if we stop by the platypus enclosure,” Charles asked brightly.  It tore Erik to the very heart to deny his rare golden leaf of the sun-ripened vine anything, but time was of the essence.

“No, my—, that is no, Charles.  Not now.  Soon, when we conquer the humans once and for all, we may spend all the time you wish with the platypi.”  

Charles seemed agreeable to that, and followed closely as Erik looked about for signs of an exit.  There had to be a way for the despicable humans to get in and out. Erik wasn’t fool enough to think that the lanky human and the lady human and the red-headed manservant would reside here at all times. Then again… Humans were unpredictable at the best of times.

“Where are we going?” Charles asked, panting a little as he tried to keep up with Erik’s longer strides. Guiltily, Erik adjusted his pace accordingly.

“Trust me,” Erik said as he grabbed Charles’ paw and scampered across the hallway towards a large sliding glass panel. He could see sunlight and sky on the other side.  

“I do, of course, but I would like to point out that you hardly answered my question,” Charles panted.  Erik squeezed Charles’ paw reassuringly, all but dragging the koala through the sliding glass contraptions as the humans murmured and shrieked behind them.  At last! Freedom!  He could hear Charles huffing behind him, but they were still far too close to stop now.  Certainly, once he led Charles to their destined land and together chose Ours, he would understand.  

When he thought they were far enough away, he nudged Charles up a tree, following closely behind him.  He surveyed the surrounding area from the topmost branches, but saw no sign of humans following their trail.  

“Good news, my dearest Charles, light of my life!  We have evaded the damnable humans!  Quick, let us press on now, while we have the advantage!  We can find a new land, a better land, and gather our kind to us.  We’re meant to be together, you and I, snuggled in Ours.”  He turned to see Charles’ reaction to his daring speech, but alas, not even his stirring words could stir his beloved from his innocent slumber.  Erik felt his heart melt at the sight, and redoubled his vow to keep Charles safe from the humans and their treacherous schemes.  

* * *

Sean, not for the first time since he started his internship at Taronga Zoo, wished he were somewhere else. It was hard not to notice they had missing koalas when the zoo only had two koalas in residence.Well, a koala and a drop bear. Unfortunately, or was it fortunately, he had not been present during the great Koala Upsurgence (as named by Raven).

“Charles!” Sean called out as he drove the buggy around the zoo at terrifying speeds of 20 kilometres per hour. “Erik!”

He had no idea where Raven and Hank were when Raven had ordered him into the buggy to look for their escaped animal friends. Raven had looked suspiciously calm and Hank, well, Hank looked like he needed a blunt for he kept mentioning something about things ending in tears.

Drawing the buggy to a stop next to the platypi enclosure, Sean got out and looked high up into the canopy of the trees. It was unlikely that Charles and Erik had escaped the zoo entirely yet. No doubt Charles, who had only ever lived in captivity, wouldn’t be used to the amount of running, jumping, climbing that would be required of a proper escape artist (there had been a small but memorable incident relating to a red panda escaping a few weeks back). And if Sean’s hunches were correct, Erik would no doubt be right next to his Koala boyfriend. Perhaps even husband. Sean needed to check his textbooks about that one.

“Charles! Erik! Where are you?” Sean kept a close eye for any sign of movement.

“Excuse me, mister,” a young girl with a streak of white in her auburn hair called out. She held a stuffed zebra to her overalled chest as her, presumably, mother held her other hand. “Have you lost somethin’?”

Sean blinked. “Well. Yes. Sort of.” He scratched at his cheek sheepishly, wondering what kind of punishment was in store for him once the higher ups got wind of his charges escaping. “I’m looking for a koala and his koala husband. I’m looking for them, you see. What’s your name?”

“‘m Anna-Marie. This is Stripey.” She held out the zebra for Sean’s inspection.

“Hello Anna-Marie. Stripey,” Sean greeted, awkwardly petting the well-loved plushie’s head as gently as he could. The poor animal looked like its face may require facial reconstruction if too much affection was paid to it at an one time. And Anna-Marie looked to be doing a fine job in the affection department. “I’m Sean. Could I ask you to help me with a very important mission?”

The little girl nodded, green eyes bright and sparkling with enthusiasm. “Of course!”

“You see those big tall trees over there?” Sean pointed to gesture the tall eucalyptus trees next to the wombat enclosure. “Charles and Erik are probably koala-napping in one of them right now. I need all the help I can to find them.” He paused, grinning from ear to ear as he realized that he could make a new interactive activity out of this disaster.

“What can I do after I find ‘em?”

“You tell anyone that looks like me--” Sean gestured down at his uniform with a grin. “--And then you let me, or Raven or Hank know.”

“Raven’s a funny name for someone who works with koala bears.” Anna-Marie wrinkled her nose. “But sure thing, Mister Sean. Mama and I will help!”

* * *

Erik awoke to the assorted noises of humans and, of all things, wombats.  He looked around, keen drop bear senses alert, taking stock of their surroundings.  Charles snored softly beside him, and Erik’s heart fluttered at his proximity to his beloved.  

“For you,” he whispered.  “I will lead us to freedom for you.”

“HEY MISTER SEEEEAN,” a high-pitched human voice bellowed.  Erik jerked around, only to see a tiny human pressed against glass.  How did they get so near while he slept?  He vowed to wreak vengeance upon their foul tricks once and for all.  

“MISTER SEAN I FOUND YOUR KOALA,” the tiny human shouted again.  Of course!  She was looking for his beloved, most valuable treasure of all, with eyes more precious than the most glorious pebbles in the clearest of lakes!  

“Charles, my darling! Wake up! We must flee!”  Erik shook Charles gently, but all that happened was Charles loosening his grip on the tree trunk and instead grasping Erik around his belly.  He tried to run, but Charles’s grasp wasn’t conducive to movement. And even so, Erik could hardly bring himself to disturb Charles from his nap.

“We haven’t time, Charles!” Erik pled as the redheaded manservant’s voice grew louder.

“There you are,” the lanky veterinarian chided.  “You had us worried for a bit.”

Erik tried to evade the the blonde zookeeper’s hands, but it was too precarious to move much.  If he were to jostle the fuzzy fur on Charles’ head, he would never forgive himself.  

“Here you are, my favorite bears,” the blonde zookeeper cooed.  She cuddled them closely, much to Erik’s displeasure.  Behind her, the lanky veterinarian whispered something that sounded like ‘marsupials’ and screeched when she stomped on his foot.

“Oh, my love,” Erik keened.  “I have failed you.  We were close to finding Ours, and I led you astray.  Forgive me, my tender-hearted leaf of the summer’s eve!”  Charles only snuggled Erik closer in his sleep, which was gratifying indeed.  Erik vowed to redouble his efforts to win Charles’ heart and find their new home.  

“Let’s not have more adventures like this,” the redheaded manservant said as they re-entered their enclosure.  “I’ll bring you more tea with those biscuits you like, just, stay put.  Okay?”

Erik glared.  He didn’t need the pesky humans for tea.  He could make tea himself.  Then Charles would surely be his!  Erik bellowed decisively as the redheaded manservant scampered after the blonde zookeeper and the lanky veterinarian.  He was confident that this plan could not fail.  

* * *

Erik was attempting to make his own, superior, style of eucalyptus tea for Charles when the Koala in question climbed onto Erik’s branch.

“What are you doing, my friend.”

“Nothing!” Erik said, perhaps too quickly. But it wouldn’t do to have Charles’ surprise ruined.

“I see,” Charles replied. They sat together in silence for a moment, Erik trying to discretely stuff as much of the tea supplies in his mouth as he could to hide the evidence. “It is a lovely night,” Charles murmured, leaning closer to Erik. Erik bearfully did not choke on the shredded eucalyptus and twig combination in his eagerness to answer his most beloved fuzzy wuzzy.

“Indeed,” he replied, coughing. A little leaf matter escaping and hopefully Charles hadn’t noticed. “It is a night to rival anything the Drop Bear poets of yore spoke of!”

Charles looked at him, fond and soft, and slowly rested his head on Erik’s own shoulder. Goodness, could his wooing have been so effective already!  For Charles, most beautiful, trusting Charles to trust Erik with such a precious gift as his safety and comfort!  Truly, nobear had ever been so lucky.

“Mmm, this is nice,” Charles said drowsily. “Don’t get me wrong, I like it when we look for eucalyptus together, and have Sean fetch us tea and biscuits, and play ‘escape from the enclosure’, but sometimes it’s just nice to have an evening in, darling.”

“Darling?” Erik pressed, overcome with hope and love. He hoped that he didn’t spit any twig or eucalyptus residue at Charles, light of his life, bear of his heart, singular perfect being for whom odes should be written, whose kindness should be spoken of in the stars, when he spoke.

“You don’t mind pet names, do you?” Charles asked, snuggling closer against Erik. “I mean, we’ve been together a few weeks now.”

“We have?” Erik stammered, heart thrumming. Could he truly be so lucky as to have won the fair heart of Charles, dewdrop of his life?  “I mean yes. Yes, we have, dearest.” He pressed one of Charles’ paws to his chest. “My Charles, I swear on the ruin of Mine that I will make you the happiest Koala to ever live.”

“But that’s just it,” Charles sighed, pressing his sweet face against Erik’s chest. “You already have. I could not ask for a better life than one spent with you.”

Erik, for the first time in his not so considerable years, was speechless. Never had he hoped in his wildest dreams that there would come a day, a night, when Charles would be receptive of his advances. And for a Drop Bear of his considerable vocabulary, this was a feat that only His Precious Tea Drop That Tasted So Sweet In The ‘Koala-Tea’ Mug could ever achieve. Only Charles.

Together, they sat underneath the moon and stars, snuggled in at the top of the choicest bough the enclosure could offer. It was nothing at all compared to Mine, Erik’s heart would perhaps never recover from that devastation. But in other ways, it was much better to have the love of his life so close as they sat together listening to the serenades of the nightlife around them and the awkward shuffle of the red-headed manservant loping away. 

**Author's Note:**

> Just so you know, the [koala escape artist actually happened recently](http://koalaland.com.au/koala-escapes-enclosure-at-san-diego-zoo-sits-in-eucalyptus-tree)!


End file.
